Laird upset to miss hot dog eating competition

1. No confirmation yet as to whether Gerald Lard was thinking about hot dogs when he tossed a perfectly called pitch-out into center field in the second inning. The portly Tigers backstop seemed distracted all morning and Leyland considered starting Avila knowing how much Gerald likes hot dogs. "Sure, I've got a great job but boy would I like a shot at that Nathan's title. I want Chestnut!!"

That being said, Lard's error which sent Gutierez to third base was the type of play that has plagued Bondo's career; more pointedly, his inability to pick a teammate up when something goes wrong. In this case, Bondo showed his new-found maturity by pitching intelligently with only one out. He unintentionally intentionally walked Kotchman, throwing him nothing but junk that he would either not swing at or would swing and miss. With Kotchman on first, Bondo set out to get his double play ball and keep the run from scoring (all the more important with a one-run lead on Cliff Lee). He threw Wilson nothing but sliders and change-ups down in the zone, just the type of pitches that turn into ground balls. Luckily, this lineup isn't good enough to make contact and Bondo's pitches were located well enough for two strikeouts and Lard's wiener dreaming didn't hurt the Tigers on the scoreboard. In this inning at least, Bondo was able to control his emotions when something out of his control didn't go his way . . .

2. This just in, Cliff Lee is good. Of his first 50 pitches, he threw 41 for strikes. An 82% strike ratio is "off the chain" as Rod would say. The difference between good and great major league stuff is the ability to throw multiple pitches for strikes and not get hurt. Lee can make his fastball move in or out depending on the batter and locates his off-speed stuff as well as any left-hander in the game. It took Lee exactly six pitches to strike out Inge and Lard with men on 1st and 2nd in the 4th inning, never throwing the same pitch twice. The contrast between Lee and Bondo is stark. Bondo has to work with deception and pitch out of the strike zone, hoping to fool you into swinging. This is why he worked every inning with at least one runner on base today. Lee attacks the zone with different speeds and confidence that you won't get good wood on the ball. Damn, I hope he doesn't go to the Twins.

3. So much for Bondo's new attitude. In the 5th inning, a few close pitches went against him and he started railing against the umpire. Noticeably rattled and throwing his hands in the air, it was clear that the wheels were coming off. With his attention clearly on the umpire, Bondo served up another three-run shot to right field and was ejected moments later with the game out of hand at 7-1. Crying about balls and strikes is bush league. It screams of desperation and he might as well be yelling "Jesus, I can't make a pitch that good two times in a row! What am I supposed to do now that I'm in a 2-0 hole? My stuff isn't good enough to get out of this situation! You're screwing me because I'm not talented enough to pitch my way out of a jam like the Cy Young winner pitching for the other team!" Look, umpires vary wildly on strike zones but they're typically calling a game the same way for both teams. If you're getting squeezed, man up and fight through it. You like a rookie whining to an umpire about your inability to consistently hit the plate.

Mags picking daisies and f-ing Nick Punto

1. Mags has braces. I noticed in the first inning today and wasn't sure where I was going to go with it. Then came the 3rd inning when Mags must have been distracted by some beautiful butterflies as he let a duck snort from Morneau drop five feet in front of him to let the tying run cross the plate. I love you Mags, but quit picking daisies like a pre-pubescent little leaguer out there. If you're worried about cutting your lips with those braces, just get a mouth-guard.

2. Bonderman acted like a professional last night. He clearly didn't have his stuff and battled through 5 1/3 innings with a chance at a win. He threw only eleven strikes in his first 37 pitches and what was crossed white was not impressive. That being said, he kept the game in check with three double plays in the first four innings in a game that could have easily gotten away from him. The old Bondo would have caved mentally in at least one of those innings, knowing he couldn't rely on his natural gifts. He would have squandered that four run lead and been pulled in the third inning. Alas, this is not the old Bondo. He worked the corners and kept the Twins swinging at his offspeed pitches, staying in just long enough to hand the ball to the best bullpen in the American League. Kudos to you Bondo - you're still my Tiger.

3. Cabrera has a ten-game hitting streak to go with his 67 RBI. If you reading this blog, get to MLB's site and vote. I simply will not stand for the ass clown from New York making the team over Miggy.

http://detroit.tigers.mlb.com/mlb/events/all_star/y2010/ballot.html

4. Armando, you can't walk mainstay #9 hitter Nick Punto with two outs and a man on first base. It normally leads to a triple by leadoff hitter Denard Span and a two run deficit. Next time you're in that situation, heed this sage advice.

5. The Tigers are 6-17 in Minnesota since the start of the 2008 season. Our pitchers are sporting a 6+ ERA during that time, two full runs more than Twins pitchers. In addition, the Twins stole the AL Central Division from the Tigers in 2006 and 2009 on the last game of the season. Even when we beat this team, they keep it interesting until the last pitch of the game; no lead is ever safe. I hate these assholes.

6. The Twins have hit into a league-high 88 double plays this year. That is a staggering number that is doubtless higher due to the arrival of Jim Thome. Another way to look at this stat is that the Twins get men on first base with less than two outs more than any team in the league, a situation that puts high stress on starters and leads to high scoring games. If the Twins ever stop killing their own rallies, they are going to be dangerous. Great article on www.twinkietown.com if you want to read more on this topic.

http://www.twinkietown.com/2010/6/1/1495457/why-are-the-twins-grounding-into



7. Note to Fu Te Ni, you can't walk #9 hitter Nick Punto with two men on and two outs. It normally leads to a triple by leadoff hitter Denard Span and a seven-run deficit. In fact, you should stay in the bullpen unless we are facing the Pirates, Nationals, Diamondbacks or Royals.

Seriously, Nick Punto . . . WTF?

8. This shitty outing by Tigers pitching makes me miss Zumaya already and now a quick work on Zoom. His injury is probably best case scenario. After the scene last night in Minnesota, I was certain that Zoom tore a ligament and would need Tommy John surgery. That kind of pain normally signifies the last time you'll see a pitcher on a mound. Fortunately, Zoom merely fractured his elbow which will not require surgery and he should be back at Spring Training next year. This must be getting old for Joel by now but it's understandable given the pressure an arm like his is subjected to on a regular basis. Joel has thrown over 400 pitches over 100 MPH in 2010 alone; the next closest pitcher has thrown less than half of that. Good luck with your rehab Zoom - we'll miss you.

9. Ricky Porcello Update: My old man and roving www.ianjr.com reporter Barry Mazeroski, scouted Ricky in Toledo tonight as he made a start for the Mud Hens.

"Looked like more of the same. He went six innings, gave up ten hits and five earned runs. Everything was up and he'd have given up more runs if not for some great defense behind him. He's not ready."

10. Ramon Santiago is looking more and more like a starting shortstop every game. He made an incredible play in the 6th inning, ranging deep into the hole off his backhand and firing a hose to first. He has been impressive at the plate as well, hitting .270 and shows the bunting skills of someone who should be hitting in the two-hole on a regular basis.